FilmJabber.com DVD Reviews - Last 20

Whatever Works (2009) DVD Movie Review

2009-11-20

Has Woody Allen finally realized that he's too old to be flirting with 20-year olds? Perhaps not, but in Allen's latest comedy, the famed director is up to his old tricks - but this time he uses none other than Larry David in his place.

David is, in reality, the perfect successor to Allen. Known for abrupt, logic-defining humor (not to mention that he's not all that good looking), David has made a name for himself as an actor on "Curb Your Enthusiasm," which in turn is a play on "Seinfeld," where he plays an annoying jackass who questions everything, bucking social standards that get in the way. Allen and David's styles aren't exactly the same, but they're close enough, and in Whatever Works, Allen adjusts his writing to David's strengths. Unfortunately, the result a mildly entertaining but ultimately lackluster comedy.

In Whatever Works, David plays Boris Yellnikoff, a New Yorker who is perfectly content being nice to no one. But when a homeless girl named Melodie (Evan Rachel Wood) talks her way into sleeping on his couch, he reluctantly finds himself a friend. Despite their age difference, which he repeatedly points out, the two end up getting married. But when Melodie's mother (Patricia Clarkson) shows up, the woman sets out to hook Melodie up with a younger man.

As with many of Allen's other comedies, Whatever Works takes place in an alternate universe where emotions are inconsequential and actions can be talked away with little negative impact. The elements of this universe make it possible for the story to work; after all, in real life, no one would put up with David's incessant badgering, let alone marry him (especially if you look like Evan Rachel Wood). Some funny moments do emerge from Allen's ability to just tell the story the way he wants to tell it, without worrying whether the audience actually buys the premise.

Unfortunately, the fact that it's so hard to buy the premise - that Wood would find anything to like in David - and the subsequent developments that occur leaves little to be desired. Whatever Works is a lot like an extended version of "Curb Your Enthusiasm," only less funny and cringe-inducing. It's not nearly as good as the worst episode of "Curb Your Enthusiasm," and so what's the point?

The performances are fine, though David merely plays an enhanced version of himself. Wood is cute and entertaining, though this can hardly be called one of her better roles. Clarkson is OK but doesn't get to show much range.

Whatever Works feels less like a Woody Allen movie and more like an episode of "Curb Your Enthusiasm," only not as good. It has its moments, but ultimately lacks the edginess that "Curb Your Enthusiasm" maintains on a weekly basis. This is one that can be skipped.

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G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra (2009) DVD Movie Review

2009-11-18

Hi, my name is Stephen Sommers and I'm the director of the drama called G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra. I've been making movies since 1989, and in that time my goal has been to win an Oscar for Best Director. Or win a Razzie. I have yet to win either because Hollywood just doesn't understand my sophisticated storytelling techniques or complex, layered characters. They just don't understand. But audiences love my movies. They told me The Mummy was good, so I made a sequel. That movie made a lot of money, so I learned that people like ridiculous plots with terrible special effects. That's how I came to make Van Helsing, one of the most celebrated films of this generation.

It's been five years since I made Van Helsing, but Paramount Pictures, in their infinite wisdom, talked me out of retirement to make a G.I. Joe movie. The movie would be based on some plastic action figures and a cartoon. I confuse it with Barbie, but my award-winning writers, who, according to critics have made much better movies than I have, keep me in check.

A lot of people thought that G.I. Joe should be a gritty action film with lots of warfare and excitement, but me, being the genius that I am, decided to do something different. A lot of people thought that making a halfway successful adaptation of the cartoon would be easy - but making movies are never easy - and I had to show audiences who was boss. Thankfully, Paramount gave me $170 million or so (I lost track because I can't count that high) to do just that.

On the surface, I know that G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra looks awful. That's intentional. I don't like using all those fancy special effects that Michael Bay and Steven Spielberg and Roland Emmerich use to engage audiences and make things look believable; I prefer to lock some college interns in a basement and threaten them with no food unless they make my visual effects as corny and lame as one can be. Paramount insists I can't use stick figures, though, so I'm a little pissed about that.

Yes, some may say that the visual effects in G.I. Joe are so bad that it removes all facets of suspense from the picture, and that they are on par with a bad SyFy Channel movie (wait, have I been spelling "Sci-Fi" wrong all these years?). But people don't understand my brilliance. By using embarrassingly horrible special effects, I allow audiences to look past the gloss and see where I put most of that $170 million: the screenplay.

Yes, I've hired the best and brightest C-grade actors such as Marlon Wayans to bring what is sure to be one of the best screenplays of the year to life. I wanted to hire Ben Kingsley, too, but he was busy doing an Uwe Boll movie at the time. I feel people were distracted by the beauty of Sienna Miller and Rachel Nichols a bit too much, but there's nothing I can do about that now.

Where was I? Oh yes, the screenplay. It's wonderful, isn't it? Where else can you see such a ridiculously cheesy plot such as the one in G.I. Joe coupled with such dialogue as "Try this on for size, boys," and "Nice shoes," and "For you, Zartan, I'd make an exception." I get giddy just talking about such classic dialogue.

Sure, the movie isn't as bad as all the critics said, but that's only because I like to set expectations so damn low. It's hard not to find the movie mildly entertaining on a visceral level, as it moves along at a fast pace and presents plenty of action. I'm just glad I did the opposite of such films as The Dark Knight by making the action as unbelievable and ridiculous as possible. Otherwise, what's the point?

Oh, and I was never fired from Paramount during the editing process. Sure, three of the studio executives had to go into suicide therapy after seeing an early screening, but I'm certain that they had psychological issues related to other life problems.

Did you hate my movie? You just don't understand it. You need to look deeper, beyond the crappy special effects and the terrible acting and the downright lame screenplay. It's all for appearance's sake. It's like Citizen Kane for the 21st century.

Review by Dakota Grabowski (C-)

If there's one thing that Paramount Pictures and Hasbro accomplished with G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra, it would be that they delivered a movie that met expectations. There's no doubt that before going into the film, the general movie-going populace expected to see action in spades. Well, to a fault, Paramount and Hasbro provided a tremendous amount of explosions and fight scenes, but failed to offer any semblance of a storyline or attachment to the characters.

Generally speaking, the castings for the majority of G.I. Joe's popular characters were hit and miss. Dennis Quiad was the principle problem with the film as his General Hawk would be a one-note wonder in the music industry. Quaid has never been known for his action-star prowess, so for the most part, he stands (or sits) in the film barking orders without any affliction. This could be said for the majority of the lead characters from the G.I. Joe side of things: Marlon Wayans is there providing laughs and never evolves into the hero he's made out to be at the end of the film; Channing Tatum is often giving his best deadpan stare into the camera as he offers no personality to the role that is often said to be the most popular character in the franchise; and lastly, Rachel Nichol's Scarlett isn't anything more than eye-candy as she is stereotypically placed in a battle of wills against the female villain, The Baronness played by Sienna Miller.

That isn't to say that the entire cast performs in a trivial manner. Joseph Gordon-Levitt's physical performance may be underwhelming, but the voice he puts forth is fantastic due to how unrecognizable it is. Christopher Eccleston (from Dr. Who fame) hams it up with the best as Destro and that is, to say, a compliment in a franchise based on action figures. It's too bad that Arnold Vosloo, a Stephen Sommers regular, didn't get more screen time since his villainy was more entertaining than watching Sienna Miller try and show her cruelty; her case as a villain was on par with a Chihuahua barking at your feet - not intimidating at all.

The best action scenes usually involved the martial arts of the masked ninja Snake Eyes (played by Ray Park) and his adversary Storm Shadow (played by Lee Byung-hun). In terms of story, these two characters are the most fleshed out since they see beginning, middle and an end to their story-arc. The flashbacks to when they were just children learning martial arts are among the top scenes - which are far too few - in the film since, at times, they felt believable. But in an overall sense, G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra is non-stop action, especially since the last 35 minutes of the film was basically an all-out and in-your-face assault that never lets up for a breather. Due to the horrible pacing, the only reason to sit through The Rise of Cobra is to see who faces off against whom as if it were WWE wresting.

Taking a look at their $170 million dollar budget, one has to wonder where all their money went since the CGI and visuals of The Rise of Cobra weren't outstanding. The design of the film borrows too much from The Matrix and the original X-Men as the costumes, aside from a few, are jet-black and 100 percent leather. It's understandable that the studio wanted to move away from a cartoony feel, but when the studio turns around and dishes out one of the most cartoonish storylines in 2009, you'd think it was acceptable to match the design to the feel of the film.

If, and when, there's a sequel, Paramount and Hasbro have a lot of work to do to improve on the quality of the film series. As it stands right now, G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra is a no nonsense action film that is comical and, at times, immensely outlandish.
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Trick 'r Treat (2008) DVD Movie Review

2009-11-14
There was no lack of horror movies in theaters this Halloween, but some who opted to stay home opted for Trick ‘r Treat, an oddly anticipated creep film that due to whatever reason went straight to DVD. The movie, a collection of short stories loosely tied together and set around the scariest night of the year, is a mildly entertaining but not particularly scary picture from Michael Dougherty, the writer of Superman Returns and X-Men 2.
Trick ‘r Treat has a surprisingly well known cast that includes Anna Paquin, Dylan Baker, Brian Cox and Leslie Bibb, though the way the film's structure work, they rarely share screen time together. Dougherty, who also wrote the movie, tells five or six stories that explain why people shouldn't blow out their jack-o-lanterns before midnight, how school principals can also be serial killers, why women shouldn't be left alone on Halloween and what happens when you don't give trick-or-treaters candy. Everything is pieced together with overlapping characters, notably one silent trick-or-treater named Sam, who is the creepy looking kid who graces the DVD cover.
The movie falls into that unfortunate category stuck between horror and comedy; Trick ‘r Treat is odd and clearly trying to be funny at times, but it really isn't for the most part. And yet, the movie isn't scary, either. So, ultimately, you have a not-so-funny, not-so-scary horror film, and that ain't good.
Nevertheless, given the rather short stories and the strange blend of genres (there are aliens, zombie children, vampires, serial killers and more), there is enough to keep one amused. The talent involved helps; Baker is especially good, and you generally can't go wrong with Paquin (especially when vampires are involved).
All in all, Trick ‘r Treat is a hard-to-love, hard-to-hate movie. It doesn't have a lot going for it, but it doesn't have a lot against it either, and as a result, if you've seen all the other horror movies, Trick ‘r Treat may be worth it. Unfortunately, I'm still not sure which I got.
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I Love You Beth Cooper (2009) DVD Movie Review

2009-11-09
Chris Columbus, how hard we fall. Since directing Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, the director has provided audiences with two brain-numbing pictures: the adaptation of the musical Rent and this year's atrocity, I Love You, Beth Cooper. Based on the novel by Larry Doyle, who subjected audiences to the Ben Stiller travesty that was Duplex, I Love You, Beth Cooper is shockingly one of the worst movies of 2009.
At first glance, it was clear that Beth Cooper wasn't going to be great. A teen comedy about a nerd who, after declaring his love for the head cheerleader during his valedictorian speech at high school graduation, finds himself out on a wild night on the town with the girl - who's willing to give him a chance - there wasn't going to be anything remarkable or unique. That's fine. There'll be some toilet humor, a few sex jokes, a fight with the girl's sleazy ex-boyfriend and a couple laughs, and that'd be it. No harm, no foul.
But I Love You, Beth Cooper is one of the most painful movies in recent memory. It's as if Columbus and Doyle got in a room and conspired on how to make every scene so horribly unfunny just so they could bet on how many people would walk out of the theater partway through - or show up in the first place. The strange thing is that the movie is so close to be something - it just isn't. Things remain off kilter from beginning to end, and Columbus is never able to right the ship.
Beth Cooper's problem is that it tries to emulate other teen comedies without building on them, and without capitalizing on the situations the characters get themselves into. There are coming-of-age elements, teen humor, road trip antics and more, but they're all pulled from more successful comedies. Why does there need to be a stereotypically sleazy ex-boyfriend, or a vicious raccoon, or a main character who is so unrealistic he's impossible to like?
And that's the biggest problem: none of the characters are even remotely believable. Sure, American Pie had an awkward Jason Biggs, as have plenty of other teen comedies before it. But they were at least somewhat believable. Paul Rust is just bad as Denis Cooverman, though he can hardly be blamed when pretty much everyone involved in the picture is embarrassingly bad. When that's the case, you know the problem is the script, not the actors. His best friend, played by Jack Carpenter, is boring and relies on spitting out movie quotes to evoke humor. Beth Cooper's friends are remarkably dull and cringe-inducing to watch. Only Hayden Panettiere is halfway decent, but even she isn't very interesting. At least you get to see half a nipple and a side shot of the left boob, and when that's the best that can be said about a movie, that's not a good sign.
I Love You, Beth Cooper was never going to be great, but no one - not even the filmmakers - probably could have guessed how it was going to turn out. It's not that far from being average, but something is just off about the picture. I Love You, Beth Cooper is one of the worst movies of 2009.
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Observe and Report (2009) DVD Movie Review

2009-11-09
From the writer and director of The Foot Fist Way comes Observe and Report, a dark and surprisingly disturbing comedy starring Seth Rogen in a role that's considerably different than anything he's played before. The result: a love-it-or-hate-it film that doesn't always hit the right notes but is still consistently entertaining.

Rogen plays Ronnie Barnhardt, the head of security at a popular shopping mail. Ronnie is chubby, homely and suffers from undiagnosed bipolar disorder. After a flasher "attacks" the love of his life, a woman named Brandi (Anna Faris) who works at the perfume counter, Ronnie defies the detective assigned to the case (Ray Liotta) and sets out to top the pervert himself. More importantly, he sets out to get into Brandi's heart - and pants - despite her complete disinterest. As time goes on, his obsessions become more severe.
Rogen typically plays lovable idiots, but in Observe and Report, he is the ultimate anti-hero. On the one hand, he's willing to do anything to stop injustice; but he also has violent tendencies, delusions of grandeur and a willingness to take advantage of people when they're down (think: date rape). How you react to the previous sentence will probably determine how you'll like the movie.
Observe and Report is funny, but in a much darker, disturbing fashion than any of Rogen's previous films. His movies usually rely on laugh-out-loud, R-rated dialogue, but Observe and Report relies more on its premise. The film still has plenty of R-rated content, but the concept (a psychologically impaired security guard sets out to save the day) is much more take-or-break. It isn't as funny or witty as Rogen's other films, but there's something inherently entertaining and compelling about it. Furthermore, between Hill's writing and Rogen's performance, they successfully walk that fine line of delivering a protagonist who is so screwed up it's sad, so naively sleazy he should be hated, and yet so utterly pathetic that you want him to succeed all the more.
A movie review doesn't do this film justice. Some fans of Rogen will be turned off by the picture, while others will find it brilliant. Some expecting to love it will hate it, and vice versa. As for me, I liked it. It's funny, dark and entertaining, and features one of Rogen's finest performances. Would I watch it again? Probably not, but this was never the type of film that was going to get a lot of replay value.
Regardless, it's no Paul Blart: Mall Cop.
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Spread (2009) DVD Movie Review

2009-11-08
Ashton Kutcher may have four million followers on Twitter, but that alleged popularity didn't transfer into box office dollars as his latest film, an R-rated sex drama titled Spread, garnered less than a million dollars, albeit in a very limited release. The movie, coming to DVD and Blu-Ray this Tuesday, is surprisingly decent, but "decent" is as good as it gets.
In Spread, Kutcher plays a monotone playboy named Nikki who lives off rich women. In essence, he has sex in exchange for mansions. After hooking up with a slightly older millionaire (Anne Heche, who, at 40, looks suspiciously younger than she did when she was last seen in something redeemable, way back in 1998), Nikki finds himself drawn to a beautiful but uninterested young woman named Heather (Margarita Levieva), who seems immune to his sleazy tactics of getting women into bed. He soon learns that she has a few cards up her own sleeve, which draws him in even further.
David Mackenzie directed the movie, which can best be described as a drama without any real drama. Spread's purpose seems to be to show Kutcher and Heche in as many sexual positions as possible, though that's a bit unfair. There is a romantic element to the film as the unique relationship between Nikki and Heather holds some intrigue, though Mackenzie and first-time writer Jason Dean Hall seem compelled to frustrate the audience as much as they can in that regard. While the chemistry between Kutcher and Levieva (who was last seen in Adventureland) keeps things interesting, the movie is generally unremarkable as it has little purpose or motivation. Some conflict arises, but the entire film is so subdued it rarely evokes much emotion.
Speaking of subdued, Kutcher represents the word. Kutcher, still best known for playing an over-the-top goofball in "That 70's Show," made a wise move in doing something entirely different; while I wouldn't go as far as to call his performance great, he does a fine job here. Despite his character being relatively unlikable, he manages to carry the film and keep the audience rooting for him.
And that's the odd thing about Spread. It isn't particularly original or clever, dramatic or interesting, and yet there's something that clicks. It isn't a film I'd watch over and over again, but the nonchalant behavior by Nikki in the face of his life falling apart and his relationship with Heather make it compelling. The picture is fast-paced and easy to watch.
Spread isn't a remarkable picture, but it has a quality to it that's hard to place. The movie isn't for everyone, but if you want to see Kutcher in a different light - or see him naked - Spread may make a decent rental.
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Ghosts of Girlfriends Past (2009) DVD Movie Review

2009-11-07
Surprise! It's Matthew McConaughey! In a romantic comedy! Surprise! Yes, the McConaughey is back with another predictable romantic comedy, this one starring Jennifer Garner. Thankfully, Ghosts of Girlfriends Past has a funny enough premise that it can at least somewhat make up for its cliché pitfalls.
In the movie, McConaughey plays Connor Mead, a fashion photographer who has a reputation for being the playboy of playboys. If there's a beautiful woman in the room, the odds are that Connor has slept with her - or will have by the end of the night. So when he travels home for his brother's wedding, he immediately makes himself the center of attention - and disaster. But all is not lost. His dead uncle (Michael Douglas) appears to guide him through how he turned out the way he turned out, and how he can change and win back the girl of his dreams. The girl of his dreams, if you haven't guessed, is played by Jennifer Garner, who, conveniently, is the maid of honor at his brother's wedding.
As far as romantic comedies go, Ghosts of Girlfriends Past is nothing special. Garner and McConaughey start off hating each other and by the end of the night are back in love, despite sharing very little screen time together or having that much in common. It's not all that funny or romantic, though that generally hasn't been a requirement to be successful in the past. All in all, the movie is pretty unremarkable.
However.
McConaughey, as is usually the case, embraces his role with gusto. He seems to have had a lot of fun in the role, which isn't surprising since he gets to fool around with a ridiculous amount of beautiful women. He plays the asshole incredibly well, and does so consistently. This is his most entertaining role in years.
As they did with this year's biggest comedic hit The Hangover, screenwriters Jon Lucas and Scott Moore struck a great concept here. The "Christmas Carol" angle is a pretty unique approach, and one that pays dividends in several scenes. As a result, Ghosts of Girlfriends Past, while generic, manages to look like something a little more respectable at times.
Unfortunately, Ghosts of Girlfriends Past is no Hangover. Ghosts plays on its premise but never embraces it; Lucas and Moore seemed hesitant to fully commit to the idea they presumably conceived. Instead of applying a romantic comedy angle to the concept, the concept is squished into the format of a standard romantic comedy, and thus the concept rarely gels. Ghosts of Girlfriends Past could have been great, but instead it's merely routine. Director Mark Waters, who has helmed such quality films as The Spiderwick Chronicles, Freaky Friday and Mean Girls, does little to elevate the material; the movie looks, feels and sounds like a Hollywood machine job, nothing more.
Ghosts of Girlfriends Past has its moments and benefits from a strong performance by McConaughey, but the movie fails to live up to its potential. As a romantic comedy, there is nothing particularly cute or heartwarming, either.
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Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs (2009) DVD Movie Review

2009-10-25
Ellie, Diego, John Leguizamo, Manny and the rest are back in Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs, but hold the celebration: the movie is the weakest of the franchise, and that's saying something when the franchise has never been very good to begin with.
I've never understood why the Ice Age movies have been so popular; the three films made so far have made nearly two billion dollars worldwide, not counting DVD and merchandise sales. The first one was boring and the second, while better, was still lackluster. The third film, unfortunately, is the weakest of the three.
In Dawn of the Dinosaurs, idiot sloth Sid (John Leguizamo) discovers three dinosaur eggs and begins to raise the little T-Rexes as his own. He also stumbles across a lost world full of big dinosaurs and other dangerous creatures and vegetation, forcing his pals Diego (Denis Leary), Manny (Ray Romano) and Ellie (Queen Latifah) to venture into this world to save him. Allegedly hilarious situations ensue.
The problem is: Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs isn't funny. The previous movies, while dull at times, offered up some glimpses of hilarity; in this movie, there are a lot of goofy situations, but few if any evoke any kind of laughter or enthusiasm. The best stuff - involving Scrat, of course - was shown in the previews, leaving a bunch of cluttered scenes for your viewing pleasure.
Though plot has never been all that important to these films, Dawn of the Dinosaurs seems to completely throw any semblance of such to the wind. The movie is just a collection of random situations that the characters have to get themselves out of, which are perfectly fine for five year-olds but painful for everyone else. The movie never lets up, but after a while it gets tiring; as confirmed in the bonus features, the crew basically sat down and attempted to come up with as many zany situations as possible... the screenplay itself is rarely mentioned.
Unfortunately, the visuals are also starting to look extremely subpar to the stuff that DreamWorks and Pixar are pumping out. Not only does Ice Age 3 struggle to entertain, it struggles to even look pretty.
There are few redeeming qualities about Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaur. It certainly has plenty of adventure, but it is bland adventure at best. Little kids should have a blast with all of the random obstacles the characters face, but everyone needing more than a few goofy moments will be pulling their hair out. I wish I could say that this will be the last Ice Age movie, but we all know different: 20th Century Fox has no incentive to change its formula anytime soon.
The two-disc DVD set that I reviewed included a director's commentary, additional movie trailers and lots and lots of relatively uninteresting bonus features surrounding Scrat, including two short films, the creation of Scrat, the creation of Scratte and more. Other bonus features include some behind-the-scenes interviews with the cast and crew, primarily the visual effects people. There's not a lot of meat to bite down on here, and very little stuff for the kids alone.
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Cheri (2009) DVD Movie Review

2009-10-18
Michelle Pfeiffer stars as a highly sought-after courtesan in Cheri, a dull and unremarkable period piece from Stephen Frears, the director of The Queen. Kathy Bates and Rupert Friend also star.
Pfeiffer is Lea de Lonval, who for years has been a high class courtesan in pre-World War I Paris. Though she's starting to get a bit older, she's still gorgeous, and her friend Madame Peloux (Bates) asks her to teach her spoiled 19-year old son Cheri (Friend) a thing or two about women. But what begins as simple sex turns into a more involved relationship, but a variety of circumstances keep their love from being fully acknowledged.

Yawn. More than likely, you didn't even make it through that entire paragraph out of pure boredom. Period pieces are tougher than ever to pull off these days, especially if you take an old-school approach like Frears does here. Cheri lacks sophistication or edginess, and is the very essence of what makes period pieces so despised in some circles. It's almost as if Frears is trying to test the patience of his audience. The movie plods along through cheerfully bright Victorian sets, with girlish actors interacting with women in corsets and a lot of hammy, stodgy accents. There's nothing original or captivating about the filmmaking to make Cheri stand out from the typical BBC drama.

The story itself is uninteresting and abysmally dull. The chemistry between Pfeiffer and the much-younger Friend is nonexistent, and even the screenplay doesn't do much to convince us otherwise. Pfeiffer and the others drone through their performances, as if they knew where this film was going to end up before it hit the editing room.

This review may be overly harsh, but not a single moment of Cheri stands out as worthwhile, let alone memorable. Pfeiffer still has some ammunition left in her, but she's not going to hit the target with a period piece such as this.
As for the DVD, it has a fairly minimal set of special features: a couple deleted scenes and a behind-the-scenes featurette. Pretty dull, but you can't expect too much for a film like this.
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Land of the Lost (2009) DVD Movie Review

2009-10-18
Somebody keep Will Ferrell away from big screen television show adaptations. Please. If Bewitched was any indication, filmmakers should have seen the disaster that is Land of the Lost coming... but Hollywood executives haven't exactly shown that they learn from their mistakes. Land of the Lost, now available on DVD, was one of the summer's biggest flops - the $100 million film made less than half of that in theaters, and was Will Ferrell's lowest major opener of his career. Given the final product, it's not much of a surprise.

Based on the children's television show of the same name, Land of the Lost reworks the characters and adds in more risqué humor to appeal to a PG-13 audience. The move was a wise one for financial reasons, but director Brad Silberling and writers Chris Henchy and Dennis McNicholas fail to make anything else worthwhile. The result is a not-so-funny, not-so-entertaining sci-fi adventure film that unsuccessfully straddles the line between action and comedy.

Ferrell plays a scientist who, after years of being scorned for his outrageous theories of parallel universes, develops the technology to prove his critics wrong. He teams up with an attractive researcher (Anna Friel) and an idiot amusement park operator (Danny McBride) to venture into the unknown, but the unknown is a place full of aliens, dinosaurs and other weird things. They find themselves in a race against time to get back home.

Land of the Lost isn't as horrible as one would expect. There are some funny moments, and enough zany things scattered throughout to keep one's attention. Danny McBride, as often is the case, is the highlight of the film; his sarcastic, straight-to-the-point lines are pretty funny. The movie has a fast pace - I could think of far worse ways to spend an hour and a half.

That being said... Land of the Lost isn't that good, either. It isn't particularly funny even though it tries to be; Will Ferrell once again shows that if you attempt to subdue his one-note style of humor he isn't that effective, and he isn't that effective here. He evokes a few laughs here and there, but for the most part it would have made sense to cast someone else in the lead role. Perhaps someone with a little more acting range. Friel, who was deliciously perfect in "Pushing Daisies," is distractingly bad in Land of the Lost; her character is there for her boobs, nothing more.

What really kills the movie, though, is that it isn't clear what target audience Silberling was aiming for. Had I made this movie, I would have gone the more serious route, delivering a sci-fi action adventure film. As is, Land of the Lost is a movie made for kids - but with humor designed for grownups. The combination doesn't work. The special effects aren't very good, though had this movie been made for kids they'd be perfectly acceptable. There's nothing thrilling about the various dinosaur attacks, which makes one wonder why Silberling even bothered to do any action sequences; after all, if they don't get your adrenaline going, what's the point?

Land of the Lost isn't a complete wreck, but its lackluster delivery on every front fails to inspire. The film is lost from minute one - crappy pun intended - and if you didn't laugh at that, you probably won't find much to enjoy in Land of the Lost. And if you did... well, you have other issues to deal with.
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American Violet (2009) DVD Movie Review

2009-10-12
In American Violet, Nicole Beharie makes a strong debut as Dee Roberts, an African-American single mother of four who finds her life turned upside down when she is falsely arrested for selling crack cocaine. After the chief D.A. offers her a plea deal in exchange for no jail time - versus a long, expensive court battle in which she could face years in prison away from her children, she becomes aware of a plot that involves racism and manipulation of the U.S. legal system.
Based on a true story, American Violet is essentially a direct-to-DVD release, having earned just over half a million dollars during its theatrical run earlier in 2009. Most movies go straight to DVD for a reason, but every once in a while one slips through the cracks. American Violet is one of those films. Why Samuel Goldwyn chose to sit on this one is anyone's guess.
Beharie is excellent in the lead, delivering an emotional, heartfelt performance. She's supported by a very good and more experienced supporting cast that includes Will Patton, Alfre Woodard, Michael O'Keefe and Tim Blake Nelson. O'Keefe does a particularly good job playing the film's villain.
The movie works on account of its story, which tackles the issue of racism in the legal system. The plot drives the film more so than anything else, and this works both for and against it. American Violet is succinct and to-the-point; it moves along at a fast clip, presenting the plot points, turns and developments in an engaging and entertaining way. And yet, when you compare it to the great legal films of the last several decades, it feels small and insignificant, not because of what it's about but because of what it's missing. The characters are good but not particularly developed; what drives them and keeps them up at night is never explored. How Dee is affected by her circumstances are shown but never felt. American Violet is an engaging film, but not a gripping one. It lacks the emotional drama necessary to take it to the next level.
Nonetheless, the movie's still worth seeing; it just isn't award caliber. American Violet is remarkable for the story it presents and the actress it introduces - Nicole Beharie. Recommended.
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Proposal, The (2009) DVD Movie Review

2009-10-12
Rising and fading stars converge in The Proposal, a pretty typical romantic comedy from the director of 27 Dresses and Step Up. And yet, just like Anne Fletcher's other films, there's something that just works about the movie.
Ryan Reynolds, who after years of circling mainstream exposure finally burst onto the scene with such 2009 hits as X-Men: Wolverine and this film (and has subsequently been given his own Deadpool and Green Lantern movies), stars as Andrew Paxton, a young, ambitious man who's worked as an assistant to a bitch of a boss, Margaret Tate (Sandra Bullock). Margaret has ruled his life with an iron fist, but when she learns that she is to be deported to Canada, she finds herself as Andrew's mercy. Though the government suspects their deception, the two head off for a weekend with Andrew's family in preparation for the big day: their sudden wedding.
The Proposal is your standard romantic comedy: the two leads hate each other and due to a goofy premise, they slowly warm to one another. Some conflict arises, the two go their separate ways, and then the man has to chase the woman down to confess his true feelings. Yep, pretty standard. Still, as mentioned earlier, The Proposal clicks more often than not. Writer Pete Chiarelli has devised a decent screenplay with enough funny lines and moments to string audiences along. Bullock, an unlikely candidate to play a cold boss-witch, is actually quite good, and Reynolds is as enjoyable as always, bringing his ability to deliver sarcastic one-liners with him. The Proposal benefits from the odd chemistry the two have.
Nevertheless, The Proposal suffers from a stereotypical third act that doesn't live up to what's presented earlier. This is one of those rare romantic comedies that could have actually worked had the two leads not gotten together at the end. In fact, it would have felt much more natural. While Bullock and Reynolds have good comedic chemistry together, their romantic chemistry isn't nearly so strong; they're funny, but it's hard to see them as anything more than that. The transition from enemies to lovers is pretty questionable, and The Proposal would have been much more satisfying had Chairelli and Fletcher taken things in a more believable direction.
Beyond the sketchy romance that evolves in the final act, The Proposal also becomes dull as it nears the end. Its cleverness fades as it becomes more and more routine. There aren't many funny moments in the final moments, and the romantic reunion isn't anything to scream home about.
And still, The Proposal is a generally entertaining romantic comedy with enough laughs to keep both guys and girls engaged. Bullock still looks in form, and Reynolds shows that he can headline a major release. Betty White is also a show stealer in many of her scenes. Recommended.
The Blu-Ray includes outtakes, as well as an alternative ending and some deleted scenes, all with optional commentary. The only item exclusive to the Blu-Ray is an additional deleted scene - wow. Strangely, when I started the film, it defaulted to subtitles of the director's commentary, which, in fact, made the movie all that more amusing.
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Girlfriend Experience, The (2009) DVD Movie Review

2009-10-10
Steven Soderbergh is one of those directors that just doesn't seem to care how marketable his films are. Here's a man who put himself on the map in the early 2000's with such popular films as Erin Brockovich, Traffic and Ocean's Eleven, but who then followed those up with Solaris, Eros, The Good German and Che. His movies fluctuate between pitch perfect mainstream films and niche art, which is quite rare this day and age; even the most independent of directors, once they hit the big time, seem to sell out. But that's not Soderbergh.
In his first of two 2009 films (the other being The Informant, which I saw last night), he hires gorgeous porn star Sasha Grey to play Chelsea, a high-end Manhattan call girl who's attempting to balance her boyfriend, clients and career. Seeking “reviews” to take her prominence to the next level, she finds herself at odds with her boyfriend, a rare man who's willing to look the other way - most of the time - while she goes out and pleasures other men. When she meets a client who could be something more, however, she puts everything in jeopardy.
The Girlfriend Experience follows Chelsea as she navigates these dilemmas, presenting them as fragmented snapshots out of chronological order. Surprisingly, the movie's narrative is strong and easy to follow and is not nearly as confusing as expected. The movie, shot on a budget of less than $2 million, is simple, and yet Soderbergh makes it look like it could have cost ten times as much. The direction is superb.
Grey, of course, is an unlikely choice to headline a drama by an Oscar-winning director. The 21-year old actress has 180 movies to her credit, but almost all of them are pornos. That's a lot of porn to do in just three years. Despite the odd choice, Grey turns out to be a good choice for Soderbergh; she's gorgeous and has a surprisingly classy look. Furthermore, while she isn't asked to have a lot of emotional range in the picture, she portrays a very likable and yet emotionally tragic figure with ease.
Thanks to Grey's performance, Soderbergh's direction and a pretty good screenplay, The Girlfriend Experience is an easy-to-watch drama that examines a career line that is rarely represented in such a humanistic way. The movie isn't spellbinding or overpowering, but it works as an effective character study.
The Girlfriend Experience, for obvious reasons, is not for everyone, but if you've liked Soderbergh's other indie films, this is another quality entry on his résumé.
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12 (2007) DVD Movie Review

2009-10-07
In the Oscar-nominated 12, director and co-writer Nikita Mikhalkov remakes the 1957 classic 12 Angry Men, but with a modern, Russian twist. The result is a three-hour long epic about 12 jurors who must decide the fate of a Chechen immigrant accused of murder.
12 stars a dozen intense Russian actors who, as one might expect, each bring something a little different to the table. As with other incarnations of the story, the jurors clash and conflict with one another at first but slowly unite around the one thing that matters: the truth. Along the way, we learn what drives these radically different characters, what fuels their anger and motivations.
The movie is well acted, and yet at times over acted. Some of the characters are so intense that it's hard to imagine anyone could survive with such pure energy bursting from the seams. If some of the actors are going over the top, though, they can hardly be blamed; the script and direction calls for it, as at nearly three hours, the movie wouldn't be nearly as entertaining without them. As it stands, all of the actors involved play their characters well.
12 is a compelling movie, for obvious reasons. This is a story that has been redone multiple times, though all pale in comparison to the original. Mikhalkov has created an authentic and slick-looking film, one that clearly has some budget dollars behind it.
Unfortunately, as already stated, it still pales in comparison to the original. The movie is nearly twice as long, and as a result, it begins to feel pretentious after a while. The film expands far beyond what 12 Angry Men ever did, which is fine, but at the expense of its core focus. Mikhalkov drills into the back stories of his characters so much that after a while, the film just unravels.
12 looks good and has all the elements of a great film, but the meat that went into the story to make it nearly twice as long as its inspiration is so extreme and in-depth that by the time the final act rolls around, it's hard to still care.
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Katyn (2007) DVD Movie Review

2009-10-05
In 1940, thousands of Polish officers were taken into the Katyn forest and executed by Soviet soldiers, though to this day the party responsible is disputed. This serves as the backdrop for the Polish war drama Katyn, which looks at some of the lives affected by the massacre. The movie was nominated for an Oscar.
Much of the movie is set in post-WWII Poland, through the eyes of the women left behind. Details of the massacre are still sketchy at best, though lists of the men who were killed have emerged. One woman and mother, Anna (Maja Ostaszewska), has yet to see her husband's name listed and she's holding out hope that he may still be alive, even though it's been years since she's seen him.
Katyn has strong acting and a well-written screenplay, though the movie itself is surprisingly muted in power and emotion. Ostaszewska turns in a fine performance, as do the other cast members, but director Andrzej Wajda presents a scattered story that lacks the emotional weight I was expecting. The most breathtaking moments come at the very end, when the massacre is actually depicted, but Wajda needed to capture such a mood much earlier.
The biggest problem with Katyn is that it spans a several year period, resulting in a lack of focus. There's a story around a Soviet soldier offering Anna a marriage proposal so that she and her child will be protected, and another about a young man who finds love (but who just as abruptly gets shot to death). There's the story of Anna's husband, who, as one might expect, ultimately meets a not-so-nice fate.
As is, Katyn has its moments, but I struggled to really get into the story. For a WWII drama about the execution of over 20,000 Polish officers, I expected much, much more.
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Sugar (2009) DVD Movie Review

2009-10-05
As the baseball season draws to a close (I'm a Mariner fan, so yes, the baseball season is indeed coming to a close soon), I look back on a film I recently watched called Sugar, about a young Dominican pitcher who is drafted by a professional baseball team and moves to America with hopes of becoming a star. It's a worthwhile drama that takes a look at minor league baseball, but never really tells the audience what the point is.
Algenis Perez Soto stars as Miguel "Sugar" Santos. Miguel has a girlfriend, but his relationship is put to the test when he is transported into Single-A ball in small-town America. He moves in with an elderly couple that often hosts young players such as him, and despite not knowing much English begins to make friends with his teammates and the couple's teenage daughter. His pitching performances get better and better, leading to promotions, but off-the-field drama causes his mind to wander and his career to suffer.
Sugar succeeds primarily on its acting performances. This is Soto's first professional role, and he does a fine job portraying the up-and-coming title character. He's cocky about his future and yet unsure about his presence, intrigued by his new surroundings and yet trapped in a place that is nothing like what he knows. Had Soto not been up to the task, the movie would have fallen apart at the seams; though there are a variety of supporting characters in the film, none of them persist from beginning to end - Soto really is on his own for the most part.
Unfortunately, the movie itself, while interesting, never establishes the narrative it wants to tell. If anything, the movie is a snapshot of Sugar's minor league career, but what directors Anna Boden and Ryan Fleck intended as the point of this film is hard to determine. Sugar feels realistic, but the lack of a strong set of supporting characters results in a lack of dramatic weight; Sugar has no one to interact with, and when conflict arises, he tends to just run away.
While the first two acts flow pretty well, the third act veers wildly off course, and not for the better. As soon as the movie shifts away from its baseball focus, it loses its bearing and purpose; I was confused by the decisions Sugar made and how he ended up in the places he went. Then the movie ends, with no sense of resolution or climax. It's as if the directors said, "OK, we've told enough of his story," shrugged and then rolled the ending credits, but this just isn't enough. The movie feels incomplete.
Sugar presents a strong inaugural performance from Soto and offers up an interesting story, but the third act is a disappointment. The creative staff's inability to focus the story results in a movie that never quite clicks.
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Assassination of a High School President (2009) DVD Movie Review

2009-10-04
In Assassination of a High School President, Reece Daniel Thompson plays an awkward, nerdy school reporter who finds himself in the middle of a major whodunit where nothing is what it seems and no one is innocent. Mischa Barton and Bruce Willis also star.
Thompson is Bobby Funke, who starts investigating a rather serious crime: someone has stolen several SAT exams, forcing students to retake the important test. It's in this investigation that he's approached by the gorgeous Francesca Fachini (Mischa Barton), who is extremely upset that her great score on the test may be for moot if she has to retake it. Her promise of an award motivates him onward, and Bobby soon discovers that the culprit is none other than the senior class president. His subsequent story results in the president's expulsion, but just when the picture seems complete, Bobby realizes that it's only the beginning.
Assassination of a High School President was originally scheduled for a theatrical release, but for some reason, Sony opted to relegate the movie directly to DVD. The move is a bit of a surprise, as Assassination is a surprisingly effective whodunit. I'm a big fan of high school films as long as they aren't "teeny bopper films;" in other words, if high school is merely a setting for a story to tell rather than the central focus, I'm a sucker. Assassination falls within this category.
The movie isn't excellent by any means, but it's fast-paced, clever and mildly entertaining. It's not a serious thriller, and yet director Brett Simon handles the story seriously, which results in a film that balances teenage awkwardness and humor with an authentic mystery. The movie isn't a comedy, but there are some funny moments scattered throughout; more importantly, the whodunit focus is engaging and keeps things moving along.
Thompson is strong in the lead, providing the audience with an unlikely and likable hero. Barton, who, despite her recognizable face has yet to have a major role in a wide release, is an effective love interest; she's sexy, intriguing and not at all innocent. I'm not quite sure why Bruce Willis is involved in the film; while he's entertaining as the theatrical principal, he otherwise has little to do.
Ultimately, Assassination of a High School President is not a must-see film; nevertheless, it's original enough that it may be worth checking out if you like movies like this. Recommended.
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Year One (2009) DVD Movie Review

2009-10-04
In Year One, Jack Black and Michael Cera star as a hunter and gatherer who set out on an adventure beyond their tribe's lands and discover a cruel but hilarious world inspired by early biblical times. Unfortunately, the movie is a complete disaster.
When previews started popping up for Year One around the Super Bowl, it became crystal clear that Year One was either going to be really funny or downright horrible. Three minutes into the film, I was laughing quite a bit; by ten minutes in, I realized there was a long way to go. Once the movie's one joke runs dry (that one joke is the typical awkwardness of Cera and the schizophrenic excitement of Black), it's a quite spiral to a fiery place.
As soon as the movie shifts from a comedy about cavemen to one that parodies various bible stories, Year One is lost. It's not that I'm offended by bible spoofs; I'm an atheist and would love to see some authentic comedy based upon these stories, but Year One fails miserably in that attempt. Aside from the fact that the writers attempt to bridge different time periods, the comedy is just hideously bad. Though it's amusing to see Paul Rudd, David Cross, Bill Hader, Vinnie Jones and others appear throughout the film, their near-cameo appearances are hardly worth slogging through this mess. And yet, the writers, led by Harold Ramis, seem to have thought that this would exactly be the trick that makes Year One work.
Cera, if you're a fan of Cera, is funny enough, but his shtick grows old surprisingly quickly. Black loses his luster even quicker; I've never been a huge fan, but he is shockingly unfunny here. Those who have enjoyed Christopher "McLovin'" Mintz-Plasse in such films as Superbad and Role Models will be disappointed to learn that he is completely wasted here, as is Hank Azaria. The only supporting cast member who enhances the film is Oliver Platt, who plays a ridiculously over-the-top and homosexual high priest.
There's not much else to say about Year One other than that it is one of the most ambitiously unfunny comedies in recent memory. It starts off great, but almost immediately loses its way. It's amazing that this film ever made it to theaters.
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Away We Go (2009) DVD Movie Review

2009-09-27
Sam Mendes continues to prove that he is one of the most reliable directors of the decade, even when he switches gears and delivers something entirely different from his past efforts. The man behind such excellent films as American Beauty, Road to Perdition, Jarhead and Revolutionary Road dives into the indie comedy genre with Away We Go, a lighthearted yet surprisingly emotional drama-comedy. As always seems to be the case, Mendes' work is some of the best of the year.
John Krasinski ("The Office") and Maya Rudolph ("Saturday Night Live") are the unlikely choices to star in Mendes' latest work. For a director whose previous works have starred the likes of Kevin Spacey, Annette Bening, Chris Cooper, Tom Hanks, Jude Law, Paul Newman, Jake Gyllenhaal, Kathy Bates, Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet - most of whom have won or been nominated for an Academy Award - these TV actors, at first glance, don't have the experience or pedigree to follow in such illustrious footsteps. But both Krasinski and Rudolph turn in the best performances of their careers, ones that will likely open up plenty of doorways moving forward. Krasinski is especially strong, combining the likability of his popular TV character with a goofier but believable charisma that allows his personality to bounce off the screen in every scene. Rudolph plays his more grounded counterpart; she does a solid job of holding him down like a child would 100 helium-filled balloons.
Away We Go has a simple plot: Burt (Krasinski) and Verona (Rudolph) are a couple who discover they're pregnant. Dissatisfied with their current home - and the fact that Burt's parents have decided to move to Europe a month before their baby is born - they go on a road trip to visit old acquaintances and determine whether other parts of the country are better suited to raise a family. Along the way, they discover just how weird and/or messed up their acquaintances are.
The movie looks and feels nothing like a Mendes film. Ever since American Beauty, Mendes has always provided a very glossy, almost surreal look to his films; though Revolutionary Road was notably different from his past efforts, it too had a distinct style. If you didn't know ahead of time, you'd never know that Away We Go was directed by the award-winning director. It looks a lot like other indie dramedies, albeit with the masterful hand of Mendes at the helm. This isn't a bad thing; the direction complements the story perfectly.
Away We Go is one of the best movies of the year and one of the funniest; it's a shame, and somewhat surprising, that such a good, easily accessible movie didn't receive a wider release from Universal. Every segment has a rich set of supporting characters that will have you laughing out loud, and yet there's a familiarity that allows the audience to relate on an emotional level. The movie does turn more serious in the final act, almost jarringly so, but it's a proper way to bring the characters to their obvious conclusion.
The one real flaw with the film - and this is a very minor one - is the sad attempt to emulate Montreal in whatever location the movie was filmed. Having been to Montreal pretty recently, the scenes set in the French-speaking city stood out like a sore thumb, primarily because not a single word of French is muttered. It's not really a flaw as it was an amusing hiccup, though.
Away We Go is funny, entertaining and emotional. It avoids the typical melodramatic clichés, and is pitch perfect most of the time. If you don't have a wide smile on your face throughout most of the movie, there is something seriously wrong with you.
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Battle for Terra (2009) DVD Movie Review

2009-09-23
Lionsgate jumps into the animated film market with Battle for Terra, a cartoon about a peaceful race of aliens who find themselves under siege from a much more technologically advanced species called humans. All I can say is: didn't you learn anything from Fox's Titan A.E.?
Released in May, generally a month reserved for major blockbusters, Battle for Terra felt like a crapshoot for Lionsgate. Few people had heard of it by the time it was released, suggesting that the studio was simply hoping to make some money - any money - from it with minimal investment on their part. As expected, the movie is a second-rate animated film, offering little excitement, enthusiasm or originality.
Battle for Terra focuses on a race of floating aliens that live above a snowy planet called Terra in a state of virtual peace. Scientific advancement is limited and the species is a God-fearing one, though there are rebels, like the main character, Mala (voiced by Evan Rachel Wood). When the last remnants of humanity arrive - Earth, Mars and Venus were wiped away in a brutal civil war generations earlier - led by a general (Brian Cox) determined to make Terra their home at the price of genocide, Mala reluctantly teams up with a human fighter pilot named Stanton (Chris Evans) who shows some much deserved compassion given the fact that she saved his life.
The concept is an interesting one, and in fact sounds a lot like the upcoming James Cameron film Avatar. The problem is that Battle for Terra is a PG-rated, 3D-animated cartoon, and military "drama" generally doesn't play in that format all too well. Based on a short film, it's a little befuddling to think that someone thought it'd be a good idea to expand this story into a full-length feature while at the same time keeping it "kid friendly." The result just doesn't work. It takes itself way too seriously; there's hardly a joke in the entire picture, and the ones that are delivered fall entirely flat. The characters are incredibly bland and uninteresting, and the plot is restrained from doing anything truly interesting, such as diving into the politics of both species.
At one point, it is revealed that the alien species isn't as technologically disadvantaged as first thought, which is an interesting premise: were the elders hiding technology from their people as a way to encourage peace, or did most of them know about it? The movie never stops to ponder this question or even tell us, probably for the sake of pacing, but I found this nugget to be the most engaging piece of the film - and the most underdeveloped.
More troublesome is the fact that the entire story just doesn't lend itself to a good movie. You know that the humans aren't just going to lose or get wiped out, but you also know the protagonists aren't going to lose, either. It's hard to have a war action movie where neither side is the villain - actually, it's damned near impossible. Battle for Terra does not buck the odds.
The graphics too are underwhelming. For a budget of under $20 million, according to Wikipedia, they are perfectly good and a far leap ahead of other low-budget CGI films, but the environment the movie takes place in feels flat - which is sort of sad, considering the movie was the first 3D release of the summer. In reality, the problems lies not in the graphical detail, which is fine, but in the direction and camerawork; the picture lacks fluidity and excitement, even when it tries its hardest to be Star Wars-esque. There are a few cool shots here and there, but not nearly enough to make up for everything else.
Battle of Terra is a lackluster, uninteresting CGI film that just fails to deliver. It's a kid's film, and yet it's a serious war drama, and it's a serious war drama, yet also a cartoon. Confused? So am I.
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